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“Well, conditions are quite harsh here. The guidance we offer all of our clients to invest all their resources into preserved goods and firearms.” This nugget of sage advice comes from the Brain Gremlin – a lab-engineered, talking, bespectacled member of the slimy Gremlin horde that infests Manhattan’s super-smart Clamp Tower skyscraper in helmer Joe Dante’s madcap sequel Gremlins 2: The New Batch. At first glance, it’s merely an investment tip from one monster to another. However, in a strange manner, it’s also surprisingly sturdy life guidance. Honestly, listen to my reasoning.

When situations deteriorate, the worst thing you can do is approach matters with excessive gravity. The Brain Gremlin grasps this. Actually, a large portion of the dentally-gifted beasts that occupy Dante’s chaotic 1990 feature (debateably his greatest) possess the same wry, meta sense of humour regarding the blurry line separating everyday life and absolute bedlam. It’s one element of Gremlins 2: The New Batch that keeps me coming back – and as I age, it’s the theme that echoes the loudest.

A Childhood Obsession

Understandably, my fondness for this movie did not begin on such an introspective level. Growing up, we only had a few well-worn videocassettes at home. Included within that collection were Gremlins and its second chapter, the latter housed in a chunky ex-rental box likely purchased from an off-brand video shop and featuring snarling creatures on its knackered cover. I was right away smitten and these films quickly proceeded embedding themselves inside my tiny, impressionable mind. After that point, they became an near-everyday part of my youthful watching schedule.

Dante’s original typically gets all the accolades, thanks primarily due to its legacy as a partly frightening holiday classic – and let me be clear, I’ve watched Gremlins more times than I can count. Nevertheless, its follow-up seldom receives the same level of high regard, which feels a travesty. As a kid, I’d invariably jump at the prospect to watch Gremlins 2. During sunny school summer breaks, I’d retreat into the house and play it. When I acquired my personal TV-VHS combo unit, it remained on repeat in my bedroom. Gradually, it etched itself permanently in my mindset. If my parents detected this preoccupation, they didn’t seem to mind.

Subtler Delights and Societal Nuggets

As I grew, new understandings enhanced frequent screenings, elevating the fun of watching little green monsters happily vandalize a New York high-rise. I learned the ahead-of-its-time property magnate and Clamp Tower owner, Daniel Clamp (John Glover), was inspired directly by the eventual commander-in-chief Donald Trump, with his red-headed employee Marla (Haviland Morris) referencing his one-time partner Marla Maples. Fortunately, Clamp has more heart than his genuine article inspiration.

The “apocalyptic” video Clamp plays during maximum monster mayhem? I discovered it was modeled after a genuine “Doomsday” video commissioned by the CNN boss Ted Turner as a contingency for the world really ended. I noticed how Dante took extra pains to film varying versions of a self-referential segment where Gremlins take over the very film you’re watching. One for cinemas, a separate one for tape and broadcast, each delivering a smirking slice of meta pop-culture magic ahead of its time.

A Lasting Appeal

While it was makeup maestro Rick Baker’s wonderfully grotesque creatures that caught my eye as a child, this hidden treasure kept me hooked as an adult. Eventually, I even spoke to Dante about it myself and he had no qualms telling me he made the movie with the direct intention of mocking those who loved its goofy-but-heartfelt predecessor and craved further installments. “We were going to make fun of the fact you came to see it,” he happily revealed. This anarchic defiance and commitment to not take his sequel as gravely as his Warner Bros bosses clearly wanted him to, only made me love it even more.

When I experienced a abrupt familial death recently, I was surprised to find that, during my deepest grief, all I wanted to do was sit and watch Gremlins 2: The New Batch. Weird, right? Perhaps not. The comforting familiarity it provided was necessary to weaken my mind’s mourning mire – but the stuff it had imparted to me as an adult were equally valuable.

Like Gremlins tearing apart a genetics laboratory, there’s certain elements in life you just cannot manage. Dante knows it. The Brain Gremlin knows it too. Sometimes, you have to be like them: welcome the pandemonium, commit your entire being into preserved goods and firearms and try not to take things too seriously.

It’s robust worldly wisdom from a highly unexpected fountain – and it’s why Gremlins 2: The New Batch will always be my go-to cinematic solace.